A rabbi, a priest, and a minister walk into a bar. Bars serve people of all religions.

My friends don’t believe that I’m funny.

If one of you makes a crack about me not having any friends I will unleash a horde of ravenous raptors (Alliteration! Woo!) on you and your firstborn. I have friends. Goodness.

My friends don’t think I’m funny.

I’m frigging hilarious.

Today while lounging in the choir room office (in a totally educational manner, mind you) I decided to grace my audience with a bit of my completely normal and gut-busting humour in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Me: What is green and has wheels?

Random Soprano: I don’t know, what?

Me: Grass. I lied about the wheels.

[laughs uncontrollably]

Random Soprano: I don’t get it…..

Me: You don’t get it?? But it is so funny! Here’s another one: What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer?

Random Alto: I don’t know, what?

Me: “We are both lawyers.”

            [laughs again at the unbelievable hilarity currently being exuded from my mouth]

Student Teacher: Oh dear God, I should not have given you sugar-laced hot chocolate this morning.

Me: [still laughing]

The sad thing is, this kind of thing happens a lot. I don’t know why. I’m funny, I promise.

Why don’t you believe me?

This is my yearbook picture.